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Cause time has got a way of taking back,
Everything you thought you had
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Jules Von Richthofenjules-luzar@hotmail.com Speak
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Saturday, July 23, 2011
Fucked Up. Currently, My life has been a roller coaster ride, There's so much ups and downs, Let's talk about the down side first, 1. Parents. They are not giving me the support I needed. They don’t fucking understand me. I am not a robot whereby I can fulfill your expectations to keep studying. It’s a record for me to even sit down and study for 30 mins. You are jealous of the other relatives having good grades and stuff, If you want me to be like them, Why don’t you adopt them instead? Simple right. This is who I am and this is my life. Stop comparing me with them because I lead my own life. Fucked up shit. 2. Loneliness. Actually, I can be independent if I want to. But it’s just that there’s too much on my plate right now. I need somebody who I can trust, accept me for who I am to just listen to me. This is all I am asking for. 3. Decisions. I really don’t know what’s the best for me right now. Everything is in an illusion. I am on auto-pilot mode every single day. Sad. I wish I could do something more. For all these things that are happening, I wish you were here with me… I really need you now. Life’s still goes on even though it is full of shit right ? Labels: Fucked. Thursday, July 7, 2011
I Don't Know. I really don't know what to do with my life anymore. Everything seems to be falling apart. I really wish I had someone I can confide in with my whole heart. I really don't know who to trust anymore. Sometimes, I really wish to leave this place and go to a place where nobody can find me and scream it out loud. The thoughts of insecurity is driving me crazy. Actually, Deep down inside me, I yearn to be separated away from my parents as soon as possible, I just find that I couldn't communicate with them anymore, I can't accept the fact what my dad has done all these while and it seems that nobody has taken notice. But too bad, I noticed it and I am furios sometimes for the fact that he always shifts the blame on us for all his downfalls. I wonder what is his true colours are. Enough of blabbering, I need you now, I am running back to you. Labels: Confused. Sunday, July 3, 2011
Welcome Back Howdy there! It's been a long long time since I blogged. I kinda lost motivation in blogging for that period of time, In fact, I think I lost motivation in life. I was in auto-pilot mode for that period. I apologise for that. I have many things to ponder for these few days, First and foremost, My future. What would I be in the future ? Will I still lead a comfortable life without my parent's support ? How am I suppose to face the not-always-so pleasant society ? Would I be better off if I skipped NS ? I need an answer to all of the above soon. I need a calling to get me back to sanity. Second, My love. I am really wondering the reason for all this avoidance. Is it time to move on ? Do you still feel the same way about me as I do ? Please do answer my calls and reply my texts soon, For I really miss you so. Those above two reasons are enough to drive me crazy, With the never endings 'How' 'Why' 'What' 'When' It hope it ends tonight. Labels: Life. |
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For the first time,
we're smilling but we're close to tears. |
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